Christmas Sales May Kill or Alice in SalesLAND


And again hi! In only a few days my nation is going to welcome the new coming year and celebrate the holy Christmas. I am rather excited with the coming holidays and celebrations. However, I could have hardly noticed the depression of my nation if I didn’t find myself in the city in the middle of the day the other day.

Well, it’s a tradition in each and every country to announce great sales before holidays. Fortunately, Armenia is not an exception. When I learnt that one of my favorite shops had announced 50% discount me and my friend decided to visit it to buy some stuff for me and some presents for my family. And sooo….

We were standing in front of the clothing store. Everything seemed all right. So we took a deeeep breath and entered. I had hardly managed to make a single step when I very unexpectedly felt a sharp pain in my toe. I looked around to “thank” the causer of my pain but surely I didn’t find her.  Then I took another tiny step, already not as confident as my first one. Nonetheless, in spite of my carefulness and attention my other foot became a victim of a very rough heel.

“Hey, please, be more careful!”,- I cried out. However, it wasn’t heard by anyone, as everyone else in the shop was shouting and laughing and making as much noise as possible.

“If you really want to acquire some cheap stuff, you have to bear this”,- I thought and made my way to the shelf that was surrounded with dangerous crowd. You should have seen the shine in the girls’ eyes. They were like hunters having just seen a deer.

After a few hittings on every possible part of my body I saw a dress I rather liked. I reached it with indescribable efforts and finally grabbed it. On my way to the dress room I got several more wounds with wooden and iron hangers. After an hour of suffering and standing in the queue it was finally my turn to step in the desired environment of the dress room.

Obviously, something was wrong with the dress. Maybe it was wrongly sewed, so while trying it on it rolled up over my neck!!!! “Dear meeeee, am I going to die all alone in this gloomy and noisy dress room???” I thought. All the joyful moments of my life came to my mind, I remembered all the people I loved within a second. A DEFINITE BEHAVIOUR OF A HUMAN BEFORE DEATH!!! Then I decided to tear up the dress and save myself, but it was beyond my strength. I could hardly control my hysteria.

Fortunately my conscious was still alive to cry for help. “NAIRAAAA”, I roared, “I’m dying, please, help me!”.

Thanks God my friend was close to the dress room and heard my begging voice. She got so involved in the role of a saviour that she jumped over the mad crowd, passed the line of the dress room and found herself in front of my cubicle in half a second. When she pulled the curtain, instead of her friend she found a blue-faced, tousy-haired girl with a dress rolled up on her neck and with eyes full of tears. She immediately took out the damn cloth off my neck letting my lungs welcome the DESIRED air.

After that we returned the murderous dress to the store and ran out of it as fast as possible not even looking back.

When I came home, mommy asked me whether I had a good day. I just nodded with a slight mimic resembling a smile. I had no energy to talk or move any more facial muscles.

The moment I put my head on the pillow I fell asleep. The whole night I was enjoying every single breath I took. Now I know the price of breathing with no obstacles.

P.S. Take it easy NATION!!! Don’t let the Sales ruin your health!!!

(The story is based on real facts with some exaggerations:)))

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1 Comment

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One response to “Christmas Sales May Kill or Alice in SalesLAND

  1. Ani

    Erjankutyun@ misht patahakan e linum! Poxin munat! (mejberum Aresi matematikayi shtemarani verjin ejic:D)

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